I was born modest; not all over, but in spots. - Mark Twain

Man has imagined a heaven, and has left entirely out of it the supremest of all his delights...sexual intercourse!...His heaven is like himself: strange, interesting, astonishing, grotesque. I give you my word, it has not a single feature in it that he actually values.

Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.

Damn these human beings; if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.