Progress might have been all right once, but it has gone on far too long. - Ogden Nash

O Adolescence, O Adolescence
I wince before thine incandescence . . .
When anxious elders swarm about
Crying "Where are you going?", thou answerest "Out," . . .
Strewn! All is lost and nothing found
Lord, how thou leavest things around! . . .

People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.

I give you now Professor Twist
The conscientious scientist.
Trustees exclaimed, “He never bungles”
And sent him off to distant jungles.
Camped on a tropic riverside
One day he missed his lovely bride.
She had, the guide informed him later,
Been eaten by an alligator.
Professor Twist could not but smile.
You mean,” he said “a crocodile.!