Ogden Nash Quotes

O, money, money, money, I'm not necessarily one of those who think thee holy,
But I often stop to wonder how thou canst go out so fast when thou comest in so slowly.

Progress might have been alright once, but it has gone on too long.

Man is a victim of dope
In the incurable form of hope!

LIFE BEGINS AT THE END OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE

Naturally I am not pointing a finger at me,
But I must admit that I find Mr. Ickes or any other
speaker far more convincing when I agree with
him than when I disagree.

A young person is a person with nothing to learn
One who already knows that ice does not chill and fire does not burn...
It knows it can spend six hours in the sun on its first
day at the beach without ending up a skinless beet,
And it knows it can walk barefoot through the barn
without running a nail in its feet. . . .
Meanwhile psychologists grow rich
Writing that the young are ones' should not
undermine the self-confidence of which.

Oh, than to enjoy a storm like this
There's nothing I would rather, Don't dive between the blankets, Miss!
Or else leave room for Father.

I've earned repose to heal the ravages
Of these angelic-looking savages.
Oh, progeny playing by itself
Is a lonely little elf,
But progeny in roistering batches
Would drive St. Francis from here to Natchez.

Other people, and it doesn't matter if they are Scandinavians or Celts,
Think that anything is better than theirs just because it belongs to somebody else.

Senator Smoot is an institute Not to be bribed with pelf; He guards our homes from erotic tomes By reading them all himself.

Purity Is obscurity.

Man is a victim of dope
In the incurable form of hope.

either you get eaten by a wolf today or else the shepherd saves you from the wolf so he can sell you to the butcher tomorrow

Camped on a tropic riverside,
One day he missed his loving bride.
She had, the guide informed him later,
Been eaten by an alligator.
Professor Twist could not but smile.
"You mean," he said, "a crocodile."

If you don’t want to work you have to work to earn enough money so that you won’t have to work.