often the first thing we know about ourselves is not what we are — it’s what we aren’t. We mark ourselves as not-this or not-that, the way Ian was qu… - Meg Jay

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often the first thing we know about ourselves is not what we are — it’s what we aren’t. We mark ourselves as not-this or not-that, the way Ian was quick to say he didn’t want to sit at the same desk all day. But self-definition cannot end there. An identity or a career cannot be built around what you don’t want. We have to shift from a negative identity, or a sense of what I’m not, to a positive one, or a sense of what I am. This takes courage.