I'm sweating scotch out of every pore in my body. - Ron White

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I'm sweating scotch out of every pore in my body.

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About Ron White

Ronald "Ron" White (born December 18, 1956) is an American stand-up comedian and satirist from Fritch, Texas. He is a member of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour.

Also Known As

Alternative Names: Ronald Dee White
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Additional quotes by Ron White

My favorite place to have sex is on my tour bus, because if I can't quite have the wind to get her there, I can holler at that driver, "Pump the brakes!" [makes a sound like hitting the air brakes - chhh...chhh...chhh...] Faster! [chh! chh! chh! chh!] Thanks, Pat! Boy that Pat can fuck, can't he?
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Last year in Florida, at Sea World Florida, an animal trainer was killed by a killer whale...HUH. Turns out, there's a reason they didn't name them "ocean ponies." Some things are exactly as they seem, folks. Killer whales kill, pilot whales wear dark sunglasses. I'm not sure how the sperm whale got his name...but I'm not getting in the pool. (31:06)
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