Republicans... That's what scares people these days. That, and uh, Democrats. - Todd Snider

(Spoken) You get out in the desert and there's no signs. And of course it was just me and all my friends, it was all guys in the car, so we drove about another two and a half hours before we ever pulled over and asked anybody where we was. And we were on this thing called the Devil's Backbone Highway, right, so we finally pull into this place uniquely named "The Devil's Backbone Tavern." We go in, and all the guys say I gotta go in, you know. And so I go in there, and it's one of them bars, like everyone's drinking beer and there are like, say, twenty people in there and they have maybe, say, seventeen teeth total in the whole place. And I'm not a good fighter, or very good at protecting myself at all, you know! And I thought, well this could - this may not work out. So I saw behind the bar there was this one older woman; she looked like she was in her eighties and she kinda hunched over like I remember my grandma started to do, she kinda, she had curly white hair, and she's all... I thought, well, I could take her...

You internet people scare the shit out of me.

Making money out of paper, making paper out of trees
We’re making so much money we can hardly breathe