[playing Pictionary with his wife and some friends] - Bill Engvall

Boobs are the center of power. Boobs can make a 6-month-old baby and a 65-year-old man both act the same way. And I'm a big fan. Oh, man, I love 'em! And I ain't picky neither. I hate when I hear guys go "I don't like little boobs." I don't care! Big boobs, little boobs, saggy boobs, perky boobs. You could have boobs that look like nanners, I don't give a damn! They're the perfect toy! You squish them, mush them, POOF! They come right back out! You can't even break 'em! Oh, they're amazing. Boobs can make a long trip seem short, make a bad day seem great. [Points to a member of the audience] Bud, let's say you had a bad day at work. Boss been chewing you out all day long. The little girl sitting next to you shows you her boobs, you're like, "This day was GREAT!"

Bill and his brother-in-law had shot a deer and drove it in to get processed. At a rest stop, a woman stops at the truck

[about how people in the 90's used "awesome" wrongly]