a surplus of effort could overcome a deficit of confidence. - Sonia Sotomayor

I had never before in all these years asked that very intelligent and perceptive woman for her own version of events. I would be startled by what I uncovered and grateful even at this remove to meet a happier version of my father — and my mother — than I ever knew.

That was the Latina in me,” I said. “We’re taught to be polite.” If we were going to rely on stereotypes, at least they should be accurate. I further explained that it wasn’t in my nature to cause everyone at the table discomfort because of how I felt about his behavior. But neither was I simply going to accept being treated so unfairly. I’ve long known how to control my anger, but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel it.

How was it I had escaped when my soul’s twin, my smarter half, once joined to me at the hip, had not? His request [to forgive him] only made the load heavier. My God, what a waste.