Top 15 Charlie Sheen Quotes

We need to hack up the person responsible for this bad connection....hack him up in front of his children. We need to cut off his face and wear it and go on a really tightly budgeted shopping spree in stores that don't exist yet.

...from some distant memory as she stood there before you.

Dan Raad means Business...

The scales of justice are in disarray[...]

(on Ashton Kutcher) It's hard to give advice to a guy that accomplished. I would just give him a hug and just say, "Make me proud, dude."

(on his firing from Two and a Half Men) I would have fired my ass too. Well, maybe not like they did.

I didn’t really believe I had "tiger blood" or "Adonis DNA." These were just jokes.

It might be lonely up here but I sure like the view.

I have a 10,000-year-old brain and the boogers of a 7-year-old. That's how I describe myself." (Piers Morgan Tonight)

People that aren't special, people that don't have tiger blood and Adonis DNA (The Today Show)

I'm still alive, which is pretty cool.

I'm on a quest to claim absolute victory on every front.

I wish people would shift that focus on to themselves and their own family and their own friends and just maybe spend a little more time on their home front. And not some distant planet that is me.

I’m grandiose. Because I live a grandiose life. I’m not 'aw shucks' … because I'm gnarly. (The Howard Stern Show)

There’s been a tsunami of media, and I’ve been riding it on a mercury surfboard.