Mike Resnick Quotes

What's your secret, Mr. Flint?" asked Jiminy with a smile.
"The two greatest aphrodisiacs in the universe," answered Flint easily. "Money and power." He paused. "A hell of a lot of rhinos could've kept their horns if people had just looked at things the way they are, instead of the way they'd like them to be.

He didn't seem to mind his people being fleeced so much after I slapped him a couple of thousand credits," remarked Flint wryly. "I guess death and taxes aren't the only constants in the universe.

There is nothing worse than a meaningless death."
Flint smiled a bittersweet smile. "I envy you for thinking so.

You're going to find this hard to believe, but I don't give a damn about the money," answered Flint.
"'Hard' is an understatement," said Mr. Ahasuerus. "I find it impossible to believe.

It is the home of a very unusual race, as violent in their way as the people of Earth."
"I will assume that's a good thing to be," said Flint dryly.
"For the purpose of this proposition, it most definitely is," said Kargennian, ignoring Flint's undisguised animosity. "They have a culture that worships weaponry fully as much as yours does."
"I don't know that we actually worship it."
"Perhaps I used the wrong word," replied Kargennian. "But the fact remains that their history and cultures are as fully committed to firearms as your own. To this day, most of them carry hand weapons, as barbaric as the concept may seem.

He opened a desk drawer and withdrew two gaily wrapped packages. Then, standing up, he carried one over to Flint and handed the other to Tojo.
“What’s this all about?” asked Flint.
“I realize that we haven’t celebrated any of your holidays since leaving Earth,” explained the blue man, “but according to my calendar, today is the last Thursday in November.”
“So?”
“Happy Thanksgiving! said Mr. Ahasuerus, contorting his lips to form a smile.
There was a momentary silence.
“I’m afraid you’ve got it all wrong,” said Flint. On Thanksgiving we slaughter innocent birds and forget to abuse Indians. Christmas is when we defoliate forests and exchange gifts.”

“He has wealth, and fame, and security, and everything he ever wanted,” persisted Mr. Ahasuerus. “Why should he be unhappy?”
“Maybe because he’s got wealth and fame and security and everything he ever wanted,” replied the Dancer.

The Carnies’ First Commandment is that you never offend a mark until he’s spent all his money.

You don’t look at a man and decide that he’s sane at three-eighteen on a Tuesday afternoon and mad as a hatter at three-nineteen. People don’t make it that easy for you.

“A very reasonable attitude,” said Mr. Ahasuerus.
“That’s probably why it’s so rare around here,” said Flint.

Don't worry," said Monk. "It'll be a cakewalk."
"Cakes don't walk, Jupiter," said Flint. "They fall.

You're a very cynical man, Mr. Flint."
"That's one of the reasons you're on the road to becoming a very rich man, Mr. Ahasuerus.

You have no moral compunctions about it?" persisted Batman.
"Hell, no," replied Monk. "As Thaddeus says, if God didn't want them fleeced, He wouldn't have made 'em sheep. Words to live by, once you become a carny.

“Did you not ever want to see what was beyond the next hill, what strange and unique civilizations lay beyond your own?”
“Until I got there,” answered Monk.

The doctors told told me there would be some pain involved. Hah! When a surgeon suggest that you might feel a bit of mild discomfort, you can bet your bottom dollar you’re about to undergo the agony of the damned.