Why do you hate the idea of being with yourself so much that ‘the time you spend with yourself is now considered as loneliness
Why we fear loneliness. The fear of loneliness was injected into our minds since we were kids. We have learned that the kid who eats alone, sits alone, and has no friends is pathetic. In every book or movie, the kid who is eating alone, and has no friend is always featured as a weak character who needs to be saved.
It’s not pathetic to be alone. I realized that we don’t hate being alone. We hate to believe that we are left behind.
Being alone is a part of life. But being lonely means viewing yourself from the lens of sympathy and misery. When you look at yourself through the lens of loneliness, you feel insecure and left out.
Being alone doesn’t mean you are lonely. Being alone means YOU ARE WITH YOURSELF.
Stop romanticizing your life , one day someone will come to save you, rescue you, or rather fall in love with you. The problem with this is that you CHOOSE to believe that YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH to change your life all by yourself. You rely your hope on someone who doesn’t exist.
After college, you don’t make friends. You just network. You just try to be nice to people so you are not left behind (mostly).
We don’t want people to think that no one chose us so what do we do? We start becoming like an ideal version of whom everyone loves. We start saying YES to things that we hate. But step by step, as we become like everyone else, we go far away from who we truly are.
Loneliness is not when you don’t have people around. Loneliness occurs when you cannot find yourself inside you. The moment you feel the loss of your real self, that’s when loneliness makes a home inside you.
“There are some days when you miss yourself more than you have ever missed anyone else.
Solitude is my home , Loneliness was my cage.
Imagine Yourself as a computer and see how you have opened different tabs of your personality for each person you meet. New person,
We try hard to be NICE. We try to be good to people even when they are abusive to us because that’s what good people do, right? And this trial period keeps draining you because how can you be good all the time? How can you love others when you are hurt yourself? How can you be kind when you need to help yourself? You keep trying to meet the criteria of being a good person until you kill something inside you. And then suddenly you realize, oh, I need healing?
Make your life like a garden where you have all types of people and interests and hobbies so that you always have something or someone to love and receive love. Have friends you adore, enjoy the hobbies you are passionate about, water your plants, and love your pets. Create things and build that relationship around you that keeps you excited so that love is always around you in every form. Life will be more colorful that way
Read books of every genre. If you want to learn to live a better life, read self-help books. If you want to learn how to think better, read great philosophers. If you want to become mentally strong, read spiritual books. If you want to spice up your life, read fantasy. If you want to understand humans, read fiction. Books have it all.
But if I ask you (or you ask anyone around you), what success looks like to you, either you wouldn’t have an answer or you will say ‘Well, I want to make a lot of money, live in a nice luxurious house, give my parents and loved ones a comfortable life, travel across the world and be happy.’ How funny and sad at the same time. If all of us are different then how can our dream life look exactly the same? Because we are clowns.
« Being alone is a part of life, it’s a part of adulting. Your friends and mates cannot stay with you for the rest of your life. Life moves pretty fast and everyone is trying to run faster so that they aren’t left behind. The simple truth of life is, people leave, for good or bad, and life goes on. Some people will leave for a better job opportunity while there will be sometimes when you will have to leave people for career growth. And then there will be times when people will get bored of you and they will find another toy to play with. That’s how it is.Can you do something about it? Probably No. But you can do one thing and that is stop feeling sorry for yourself. Stop thinking that there is something wrong with you that needs to be fixed. »
imagine yourself as the main character of the movie that is your life. A movie like your life hasn’t been made yet, and a book like your life hasn’t been written yet. And that’s why you have the creative freedom in your hands to write it as you want, make it as bold and wild as you want, keep it as long as you can, and above all make it about yourself rather than following an old pattern that doesn’t empower you. You don’t want to play the role of victim in your own life. You don’t want to see yourself crying for someone you never had. You don’t want to victimize your character.