Your failure to specify your desires means your unfortunate lover will have to guess what would please and displease you, and is likely to be punishe… - Jordan Peterson

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Your failure to specify your desires means your unfortunate lover will have to guess what would please and displease you, and is likely to be punished in some manner for getting it wrong. Furthermore, given all the things you could want — and do not want — it is virtually certain that your lover will get it wrong. In consequence, you will be motivated to blame them, at least implicitly, or nonverbally, or unconsciously, for not caring enough to notice what you are unwilling even to notice yourself. “If you really loved me,” you will think — or feel, without thinking — “I would not have to tell you what would make me happy.