A good [short story] would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit. - David Sedaris

Harry Rowohlt, the fellow who translated my book into German and is reading with me on my tour, told me that when someone on the bus or at a nearby table in a restaurant talks on a cell phone, he likes to lean over and shout, "Come back to bed, I'm freezing."

Boys who spent their weekends making banana nut muffins did not, as a rule, excel in the art of hand-to-hand combat.

It's safe to assume that by 2085 guns will be sold in vending machines but you won't be able to smoke anywhere in America.