Will Scarlet Blinkin, fix your boobs, you look like a bleeding Picasso. - Mel Brooks

I think Peter Falk had one real eye and one glass eye, and having one eye was probably better for shooting pool than having two.

I got it! I got it! I got it!…I ain’t got it.

When Ethel Merman belted out “You’re the Top” even though Uncle Joe and I were two miles away in the cheap seats, it was thrilling but maybe a little too loud. What a voice! They said she could hold a note longer than the Chase National Bank.