If you're going to do something wrong, at least enjoy it. - Leo Rosten

The rabbi of Chelm visited the prison, and there he heard all but one of the inmates insist on their innocence. So he came back, held a council of wise men, and recommended that Chelm have two prisons: one for the guilty and another for the innocent.

Aroysgevorfne yorn (“years”), enunciated with a sigh deep from the diaphragm, or with bitterness, refers to the wasted years that can never be relived.

The play The Kibitzer, by Jo Swerling (1929), made both the title and its star, Edward G. Robinson, famous overnight. The sign on the door read: DR. JOSEPH KIPNIS PSYCHIATRIST DR. ELI LOWITZ PROCTOLOGIST Under this, a kibitzer had written: “Specialists in Odds and Ends.