Gentlemen? If you continue to write nasty pieces about me, I shall be obliged to cancel my subscription. - Groucho Marx

This isn’t a particularly novel observation, but the world is full of people who think they can manipulate the lives of others merely by getting a law passed. There are large groups in America who, if they could swing it, would prohibit the use of everything that they didn’t personally approve of — smoking, drinking, dancing, going to the movies, eating Italian salami and, if it could be regulated, even love.

"According to the wire, you are resting well and are being taken care of by a nurse. I hope she is beautiful and that she has red hair. I don't know why, but whenever I dream of a nurse she always has red hair. Red hair makes a man want to recover his health quickly, so that he can get on his feet and get the nurse off hers." - Groucho Marx, letter to his son

All geniuses die young.