I will paint a classic car yellow and convert it into a bul… - Jarod Kintz

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I will paint a classic car yellow and convert it into a bulldozer. If you need me, I’ll be in the cemetery digging to try to find myself as a person.

Jarod Kintz

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

I like instant gratification. It’s like instant coffee, only it won’t keep you up all night.

All drivers run red lights the same way — with a glance in the rearview mirror to see if a cop saw them. I love the same way — with a sense of defiance, urgency, emergency, and caution that comes too late.

If you tell me I look like someone you know, I might get panicked and think you’re on to me. I thought nobody saw me abduct that guy and steal his identity.

I will paint a classic car yellow and convert it into a bulldozer. If you need me, I’ll be in the cemetery digging to try to find myself as a person. - Jarod Kintz

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