God ordered the world and all things in it, and I ordered a pizza and all things on it. - Jarod Kintz

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

Love has a certain weightlessness to it, much as my meaty penis would on the moon.

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You can’t put a price tag on love. But if you could, I’d wait for it to go on sale.

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An ice sculpture in the Sahara makes about as much sense as donkey left open gaping wagon, Sergeant (add cream cheese sparingly).

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