Famous people are weird as shit. They're all weird. Your suspicions are correct. - John Mulaney

I was working with these kids ages 8-13, and I thought, oh, I remember being that age, and that is the state I would like to be in. Because they were very kind, they were very thoughtful, and they also knew that they had no control over their lives at all.

If you’re an adult male who sees no flaws in his father, you’re an insane person.

Building a gazebo in the middle of the civil war, that'd be like doing stand-up comedy now.