When I was born I was so ugly the doctor slapped my mother.

I was so ugly when I was born, the doctor slapped my mother,

I was an ugly kid. My mother breast-fed me through a straw.

I was an ugly kid. I worked in a pet store. People kept asking how big I get.

I was the worst, most sickly kid of all – 30 pounds underweight. The girls used to beat me up. Actually I was a mean kid, early on because I had no self-esteem.

I spent my childhood alone, overweight and ugly, angry at everything, and knowing nothing of a life beyond this sadness.

What a childhood I had. My parents sent me to a child psychiatrist. The kid didn’t help me at all.

My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash.

[On assuming he would never be a star] Because I thought you had to be very handsome and all that – kissing the girls and everything – and I wasn't like that when I was young. I was an ugly, skinny bastard.

He was very ugly but people can't help the faces they're born with.

If it had grown up, it would have made a dreadfully ugly child; but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.

such happiness as this, while I was an ugly duckling.

I can’t help it. I was born a miscarriage. I had so many insults I died. I was born dead. I can’t help it. I’m tired. I’m give out trying. You got chances. I had so many insults I was born dead. You got it easy. I was born dead an’ life was hard. I’m tired. I’m tired out talking and standing up. I been dead fifty-five years.” The

One little Indian left all alone, he went out and hanged himself and then there were none.