If I were a magician, I’d hand out broken compasses. It’s a… - Jarod Kintz

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If I were a magician, I’d hand out broken compasses. It’s all about misdirection.

Jarod Kintz

At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it. · 2012 Verified in 1 source Sign up to see the complete provenance

English

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About Jarod Kintz

Jarod Kintz is an American author of absurdist humor, known for self-published collections of surreal one-liners and random thoughts. His prolific, often meta-titled works include "This Book is Not for Sale," "99 Cents for Some Nonsense," and "This Book Title is Invisible," published largely through Amazon Kindle. Widely quoted online for his deadpan, nonsensical voice, he describes himself as a writer, absurdist, and duck farmer based in the American South.

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

A wink and a smirk walk into a bar, and the bartender asked them what they were drinking, when all of the sudden a mustache in a cowboy hat riding a vagina runs through the door, and right there I have to stop the joke, because not only does it not have a punch line, but that punch line was kidnapped, and if it’s ever found, it will probably be rated Not Safe For Work.

If love came in a cardboard tube, I’d probably send it priority mail. But I’d make you pay for shipping.

Our love went from fly to flower to butterfly, and it was meant to beautifully flutter, not sit still on a shelf like a trophy to be collected.

If I were a magician, I’d hand out broken compasses. It’s all about misdirection. - Jarod Kintz

About Jarod Kintz

Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz