love hugging and kissing my wife after we’ve been apart for a while.

Here lies my wife: here let her lie!
Now she's at rest, and so am I.

Let the husband render to his wife the affection owed her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

Take my wife - please!

There is a saying, when rape is inevitable, lie down and enjoy it. That’s exactly the position into which you are.

When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

I think that if rape is inevitable, relax and enjoy it.

If you don’t know how to love, then any old robot or mechanical device would best suit your relationship style. In this situation, vacuum cleaners might make the best lovers.

Only picture to yourself a nice soft wife on a sofa with good fire, & books & music.

The only way to behave to a woman is to make love to her if she is pretty and to someone else if she is plain.

Amy, Tiffany and I sat in the kitchen and talked until three thirty this morning. One of the things we laughed about was an old episode of The Newlywed Game. The host asked the wives, "What's the most exotic place you've ever made love?" He was likely expecting "The kitchen" or "On a tennis court at night," but one woman didn't quite understand the question and answered, "In the butt."

Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love.

Relax... it's just sex.

Better late than not at all, came a voice from the ranked multitude. "Better a tardy lover than a lonely bed."