If nothing else, life in the suburbs promised that you might go from day to day without finding shit in your hair. - David Sedaris

After a few months in my parents' basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations.

People are often frightened of Parisians, but an American in Paris will find no harsher critic than another American.

After a few months in my parents' basement, I took an apartment near the state university, where I discovered both crystal methamphetamine and conceptual art. Either one of the these things are dangerous, but in combination they have the potential to destroy entire civilizations.