Being sociable is both a learned behaviour and an attitude. - Matthew Hussey

I wince at the lack of compassion I showed myself, and at just how dangerous my determination and tolerance for pain can be when directed at the wrong target — in this case, martyrdom in a relationship where most of my core needs weren’t being met.

If you have those teammate traits — if you’re the one who’s trustworthy, kind, committed, communicative, consistent, generous — then you’ve got the rare stuff that’s worth fighting for. It’s also the rare stuff you should protect. And if someone doesn’t recognize those qualities in you, they’ll never value what’s valuable in you. You should keep them at arm’s length until they do. In the meantime, they’re definitely not a person worth fighting for.

In this way, curiosity helps you step out of fear, and by doing so you rob the thing you’re afraid of of the power it has over you.