In reality, the primary paradigm of the Nice Guy Syndrome is nothing more than a big covert contract with life. - Robert A. Glover

The following are a few of the ways Nice Guys unconsciously maintain a monogamous bond to their mothers. Look over the list. Note any of the behavior patterns that may serve to keep you monogamous to your mother. Share this information with a safe person. •​Over-involvement with work or hobbies. •​Creating relationships with people who need fixing. •​Addictions to drugs or alcohol. •​Sexual addictions to pornography, masturbation, fantasy, chat lines, or hookers. •​Affairs. •​Sexual dysfunction — lack of desire, inability to get or maintain an erection, or premature ejaculation. •​Forming relationships with women who are angry, sick, depressive, compulsive, addicted, unfaithful, or otherwise unavailable. •​Avoiding intercourse or taking vows of celibacy.

Humans connect with humans. Hiding one's humanity and trying to project an image of perfection makes a person vague, slippery, lifeless, and uninteresting. I often refer to Nice Guys as Teflon Men. They work so hard to be smooth, nothing can stick to them. Unfortunately, this Teflon coating also makes it difficult for people to get close. It is actually a person's rough edges and human imperfections that give others something to connect with.

"In an attempt to cope with their childhood abandonment experiences, all Nice Guys developed the same paradigm: "If I am good, then I will be loved, get my needs met, and have a problem-free life." Unfortunately, this paradigm not only produces the opposite of what is desired, it guarantees nothing but feelings of perpetual powerlessness."