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Gentlemen, why do you not laugh? With the fearful strain that is upon me day and night, if I did not laugh, I should die.

You can't laugh and be afraid at the same time," he said. And he'd be right. Laughing actually releases endorphins. They are released to mask the pain we're causing to ourselves as our organs are being convulsed.

Why did I laugh tonight? No voice will tell
No God, no demon of severe response
Deigns to reply from heaven or from hell
Then to my human heart I turn at once:
Heart, thou and I are here, sad and alone,
Say, why did I laugh? O mortal pain!
O darkness! darkness! Forever must I moan
To question heaven and hell and heart in vain?
Why did I laugh? I know this being's lease
My fancy to it's utmost blisses spreads
Yet would I on this very midnight cease
And all the world's gaudy ensigns see in shreds
Verse, fame and beauty are intense indeed
But death intenser, death is life's high meed.

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