When I was young, I was 13 going on 31. Then when I was 30 … - Jarod Kintz

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When I was young, I was 13 going on 31. Then when I was 30 going on 31, I was 30 going on 29. Now I’m in love and I’ve lost all sense of time — and all the rest of my sense.

Jarod Kintz

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

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If I ever go to China, I’m going to find a piano and play “Chopsticks” — only not with my fingers, but rather I’ll be using two forks.

I keep water in my pockets, as portable fish tanks. My love letters often get soggy with sentimentality.

I want to mail my mailman something. He always brings me mail, yet I never give him any mail. Maybe he will appreciate the thought, or maybe he will feel I am making more work for him.

When I was young, I was 13 going on 31. Then when I was 30 going on 31, I was 30 going on 29. Now I’m in love and I’ve lost all sense of time — and a… - Jarod Kintz

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