If you can be quiet, you’re more than welcome to stay in my… - Jarod Kintz

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If you can be quiet, you’re more than welcome to stay in my House of Silence. Bring your own bubblegum ice cream.

Jarod Kintz

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

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Love has boundaries, like a map, and I guess that makes me a cartographer. Don’t take this the wrong way, but you’re too topographical for my taste.

This book does not exist. And even if it did, it wouldn’t be worth buying or reading.

If anybody is looking to rent a dancing partner for an evening, I have one left in stock. That one is me, and I am on sale ‘til Tuesday at two.

If you can be quiet, you’re more than welcome to stay in my House of Silence. Bring your own bubblegum ice cream. - Jarod Kintz

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Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz