People ask me how much I weigh. I tell them, 145 pounds, na… - Emo Philips | Quotewise

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People ask me how much I weigh. I tell them, 145 pounds, naked. That is, if that scale outside the drugstore is anything to go by.

Emo Philips

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About Emo Philips

Emo Philips (born Philip Soltanec 7 February 1956) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, voice actor, writer and producer. He is known for his eccentric appearance, surreal humor, and the bizarre cadence of his voice in the delivery of his lines.

Biography information from Wikiquote

Also Known As

Birth Name: Philip Soltanec

All quotes from Emo Philips Similar Quotes by other Originators

Originators like Emo Philips:

David Sedaris Steven Wright Rodney Dangerfield Jarod Kintz J. D. Salinger

Additional quotes by Emo Philips

I was walking down Fifth Avenue today and I found a wallet, and I was gonna keep it, rather than return it, but I thought: "Well, if I lost a hundred and fifty dollars, how would I feel?" And I realized I would want to be taught a lesson.

You know what I hate? Indian givers... no, I take that back.

Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.