Hey, this joke's on the first CD, but I added a new line so… - Mitch Hedberg

" "
Hey, this joke's on the first CD, but I added a new line so I can't fuckin’ rob you of this one: I got an ant farm; them fellas didn't grow shit. I said “C’mon, what about some celery? You fuckers don’t farm. Plus, if I tore your legs off, you would look like snowmen." That's... That's the part that's not on the old CD.

Mitch Hedberg

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About Mitch Hedberg

Mitch Hedberg (24 February 1968 – 30 March 2005) was an American stand-up comic known for his odd subject matter, subdued delivery and memorable routines that often consisted of a string of one-line non sequiturs.

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Birth Name: Mitchell Lee Hedberg

Alternative Names: Mitch Lee Hedberg • Mitchell Hedberg

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I find a duck's opinion of me is very much influenced by whether or not I have bread. Ducks love bread, but they can't buy any. That's the biggest joke on the duck ever. (in addition to and along with this duck line- a bit from the Letterman show)--

I was walking down the street with my friend and he said "I hear music", as if there is any other way you can take it in. You're not special, that's how I receive it too. I tried to taste it but it did not work.

I bought a $7 pen because I always lose pens and I got sick of not caring.

Hey, this joke's on the first CD, but I added a new line so I can't fuckin’ rob you of this one: I got an ant farm; them fellas didn't grow shit. I s… - Mitch Hedberg

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