I don’t want my love with her to wither like grapes on a vine, so I’ll water it with romance to turn it into wine. - Jarod Kintz

I’m so lonely, I just need somebody to call me — even if it’s a wrong number. I’m also hungry, so maybe that caller could order me a pizza after they hang up on me.

At first sign of crisis, the ignorant don’t panic because they don’t know what’s going on, and then later they panic precisely because they don’t know what’s going on.

Nothing in this world feels quite like freedom, except for freedom. And nothing in the world tastes quite like freedom, except for fried bald eagles.