The ability to deal with adversity, to accept pain, to be calm under pressure- these are the traits we look for. Some can be taught, much is innate. - Dan Crenshaw

As my career progressed, I took note of the leaders I respected. I thought about their actions, their manner of speaking, their habits. I noticed the way they incorporated humor to give a successful briefing, interacted gracefully with their subordinates, and thought creatively about tactical situations. I observed how some leaders would react too emotionally in tense situations, and how the team reacted as a result. Calm breeds calm, and panic breeds panic. Were these great leaders the fastest or the strongest? The best shooters? Not always. The qualities that made SEAL leaders great were rarely physical in nature. They listened. They empowered their team to be successful, carefully entrusting individuals with additional responsibility. They highlighted good performance publicly and criticized bad performance privately. They didn't waste their men's time. They were prepared and thoughtful with mission planning. They were articulate but also genuine. They came across as real people with humor and emotions instead of just robotic military men.

This is what happens when angry little boys like @alexstein99 don’t grow up and can’t get girlfriends…

As bad as I had it, lots of people have had it worse than me. Lots of others had made the ultimate sacrifice. I've got the initials of eight of those guys tattooed on my chest. So even when you're lying bleeding on the ground, unable to see much of anything, and later totally facedown in a bed for six weeks, you know what? Your buddies don't even get to have that chance because they're dead. That sounds morbid, but it's true. It should toughen your spine a little bit and make you feel grateful for being here at all. Too many people don't show gratitude for the new mission that they might have. They complain. They complain about the Veterans Administration. They complain about their disability payments. They complain about their lack of opportunity. Well, your buddies don't get to complain at all, and I think they would be grateful for anything. Living with duty means having a duty to those who aren't able to complete their mission because they would want you to keep going. They would want you to live life with a purpose. That's a message for civilians; that's a message for veterans.