suggestion was surprising and slightly hard to believe. An elongated “wait” followed by a short but emphasized “what” is a good way to indicate genui… - James E. Ryan

Because you were my first friend here. You listened to me.

In almost every instance, it is better to ask clarifying questions first and to argue second. Before you advocate for a position, be sure to ask “Wait, what?” Inquiry, in other words, should always precede advocacy.

Which leads me to the second essential question: “I wonder . . . ?” Before you object, I recognize that this is, technically, not a complete question. It is instead the first half of a series of questions. “I wonder” can be paired, at the very least, with both “why” and “if.” This chapter is about these two variations on a single theme, namely the questions “I wonder why?” and “I wonder if?” Asking “I wonder why?” allows you to remain curious about the world, which would have come in handy on my run in the Netherlands. Asking “I wonder if?” allows you to remain engaged with the world and is a way to prompt yourself to try something new.