Bill Watterson Quotes

American comic artist

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William B. "Bill" Watterson II (born July 5 1958) is the author of the comic-strip Calvin and Hobbes.

From: Wikiquote (CC BY-SA 4.0)

Birth Name: William Boyd Watterson II

Alternative Names: Bill Watterson II

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I think life should be more like TV. I think all of life's problems ought to be solved in 30 minutes with simple homilies, don't you? I think weight and oral hygiene ought to be our biggest concerns. I think we should all have powerful, high-paying jobs, and everyone should drive fancy sports cars. All our desires should be instantly gratified. Women should always wear tight clothing, and men should carry powerful handguns. Life overall should be more glamorous, thrill-packed, and filled with applause, don't you think?... Then again, if real life was like that, what would we watch on television?

Mom and dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I believe in. But every time I do, they tell me to stop it.

The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that's even worse

The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure poor reasoning and inhibit clarity.

If good things lasted forever, would we appreciate how precious they are?

I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh track.

It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what’s cool.

That's the whole problem with science. You've got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.

HOBBES:
All this modern technology just makes people try to do everything at once.

I've got to start listening to those quiet, nagging doubts.

"Mom’s not feeling well. So I’m making her a get well card.”
“That’s thoughtful of you.”
"See, on the front it says, ‘Get Well Soon’ … and on the inside it says,’Because my bed isn’t made, my clothes need to be put away and I’m hungry. Love Calvin.’ Want to sign it?”
“Sure, I’m hungry too

I have all these great genes, but they're recessive. That's the problem here.

Why waste time learning when ignorance is instantaneous. — -Hobbes

Isn't it sad how some people's grip on their lives is so precarious that they'll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?

HOBBES:
If you don't get a goodnight kiss you get Kafka dreams.