Glennon Doyle Quotes

Decades after that day in the therapist's office, Donald Trump was elected president. A friend called me and said, "This is the apocalypse. This is the end of our country as we know it." I said, "I hope so. Apocalypse means uncovering. Gotta uncover before you can recover." She said, "Oh, God, not more recovery talk. Not now." "No, listen — this feels to me like we've hit rock bottom! Maybe that means we're finally ready for the steps. Maybe we'll admit that our country has become unmanageable. Maybe we'll take a moral inventory and face our open family secret: that this nation — founded upon 'liberty and justice for all' — was built while murdering, enslaving, raping, and subjugating millions. Maybe we'll admit that liberty and justice for all has always meant liberty for white straight wealthy men. Then maybe we'll gather the entire family at the table — the women and the gay and black and brown folks and those in power — so that we can begin the long, hard work of making amends. I've seen this process heal people and families. Maybe our nation can heal this way, too.

Returning to ourselves is confusing at first. It's not as simple as listening for the voices inside of us. Because sometimes the voices inside of us, which we've assumed speak Truth, are just the voices of human beings who told us what to believe. Often the internal voice telling us who God is and what God approves of is not God; it's our indoctrination. It's an echo of the voice of a teacher, a parent, a preacher — someone who has claimed to represent God to us. Many of those people have been well meaning, and others have only sought to control us. Either way, not a single one of them has been God's appointed spokesperson. Not a single one of them has more God in her than you do. There is no church that owns God. There is no religion that owns God. There are no gatekeepers. None of this is that easy. There is no outsourcing your faith. There is just you and God. Some of the hardest and most important work of our lives is learning to separate the voices of teachers from wisdom, propaganda from truth, fear from love and in this case: the voices of God's self-appointed representatives from the voice of God Herself. When choosing between something you Know and something other people taught you to believe, choose what you Know. As Whitman said, "Re-examine all you have been told in school or church or in any book, and dismiss whatever insults your own soul." Having the courage to dismiss what insults your soul is a matter of life or death.

The facts were right there in front of me to see. But the truth was right there inside of me to feel.

Why do women find it honorable to dismiss ourselves? Why do we decide that denying our longing is the responsible thing to do? Why do we believe that what will thrill and fulfill us will hurt our people?

women have to almost die before we give ourselves permission to live how we want.

All the love in the world cannot move a boulder, because the Removal is not between the impeded and the ones who love her. The Removal is strictly between the impeded one and her God.

I see your fear, and it's big. I also see your courage and it's bigger. We can do hard things, baby. We are fireproof.

Everything I need to become the woman I'm meant to be next is inside my feelings of now.

while rock bottom feels like the end — it's always the beginning of something. I knew that this was the moment I'd either relapse with a couple shots of self-pity and resignation, or I'd double down on my racial sobriety and carry on. I told myself: Breathe. Don't panic and flee. Sink. Feel it all. Be Still. Imagine. Let it burn.

Every philanthropist, if she is paying attention, eventually becomes an activist. If we do not, we risk becoming codependent with power — saving the system's victims while the system collects the profits, then pats us on the head for her service. We've become injustice's foot soldiers.

In order to avoid being complicit with those upstream, we must become the people of And/Both. We must commit to pulling our brothers and sisters out of the river and also commit to going upstream to identify, confront, and hold accountable those who are pushing them in.

Feeling all your feelings is hard, but that's what they're for. Feelings are for feeling. All of them. Even the hard ones. The secret is that you're doing it right, and that doing it right hurts sometimes.

But I would never again be alone in a relationship and pretend that was love. I would never again settle for a relationship or life less beautiful than the one I'd want for my child.

When we hand our children phones we steal their boredom from them. We are raising kids with commodified views of sex, lack of real connection, filtered concepts of what it means to be human. As a result we are raising a generation of writers who will never write, artists who will never doodle, chefs who will never make a mess of the kitchen.

Each of us was born to bring forth something that has never existed: a way of being, a family, an idea, art, a community — something brand-new. We are here to fully introduce ourselves, to impose ourselves and ideas and thoughts and dreams onto the world, leaving it changed forever by who we are and what we bring forth from our depths. So we cannot contort ourselves to fit into the visible order. We must unleash ourselves and watch the world reorder itself in front of our eyes.

There is no one way to live, love, raise children, arrange a family, run a school, a community, a nation. The norms were created by somebody, and each of us is somebody. We can make our own normal.