Mignon McLaughlin Quotes

The woman just ahead of you at the supermarket checkout has all the delectable groceries you didn't even know they carried.

What a shame that allowances have to stop with the teens: both those that are paid to us and those that are made for us.

There are now electrical appliances with the main unit so sealed in that it cannot be got at for repair. There have always been human beings like that.

You never realize how tacky your furniture is till you try to give it to the Salvation Army and they won't take it.

I have seen messed-up people of forty who still seemed salvageable, and children of six or seven who almost surely were not.

I do not trust those who are above name-dropping. The suppression of small vices always exacts too high a toll.

Family quarrels have a total bitterness unmatched by others. Yet it sometimes happens that they also have a kind of tang, a pleasantness beneath the unpleasantness, based on the tacit understanding that this is not for keeps; that any limb you climb out on will still be there later for you to climb back.

Good food, good sex, good digestion, good sleep: to these basic animal pleasures, man has added nothing but the good cigarette.

Most of us would rather risk catastrophe than read the directions.

Insult, not flattery, is the great aphrodisiac.

If you must reread old love letters, better pick a room without mirrors.

There’s an awful lot of blood around that water is thicker than.

My doctor is nice; every time I see him, I’m ashamed of what I think of doctors in general.

We wake in the night, to stereophonic silence.

Mumps, measles, and puppy love are terrible after twenty.