Wesley Willis Quotes

"Christmas is Jesus Christ's birthday! / That's what it is all about in the mix!" - Merry Christmas

Rock music pays off. Rock music takes me on a joyride. Rock music keeps me off the hell city bus. Rock music will always look out for me. But I will not let my torture profanity demon shoot it down.

"My mother smokes that crack like a cigar / She had a good time at it / She jacks my brother for dope money / She does this by threatening him with a Smith and Wesson" - My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks

"Destroy civilization, motherfucker!" - Stealth Bomber

"At 11:00 PM, the police came to my mother's house to eject her ... they locked her up for being a loser." - My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks

"Rock over London. Rock on Chicago." - Repeated at the end of most songs

"I love your movies! I love you, too!" - Arnold Schwarzenegger

"When the police pulled up, I was doomed / I was arrested for possession of a controlled substance / I was taken to the metal clink / I was nothing but a loser" - I Smoke Weed

"I am a good person to the max / I am a good guy in Jesus' name." - Wesley Willis

"This beast killed as many as 100,000 people / It's wings can flap like a bird / It can break a glass / It can also stab you in the ass" - The Chicken Cow

"I have a mean schizophrenia demon in my head / My demon racks me with profanity / My demon tells me lies and says I'm a jerk, a bum and an asshole / My demon keeps me from joy bus riding by torturing me" - Wesley Willis

"It's the end of World War I / It's the end of World War II!" - It's the End of the Western

"It was Sunday, March 12th, 2000 at 6:20 PM / I was about to fly from Chicago-Midway to Orlando, Florida / Suddenly my mean schizophrenic demon called me a jerk / Suddenly I yelled 'FUCK YOU' on the airplane" - My Keyboard Got Damaged

Here's what I'm going to have to say to all of you. If some of you have demons in your head who talk to you in profanity or whatever, don't let your demon shoot down your rock music, don't let your demon keep you off the joy bus. So like I say, Rock music pays off.

"Suck a polar bear's funky ass!" - Suck a Cheetah's Dick