I don’t like to celebrate my birthday, because I don’t like… - Jarod Kintz

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I don’t like to celebrate my birthday, because I don’t like taking credit for others’ work — in this case, my mom and dad. Or possibly my mom and the mailman.

Jarod Kintz

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Groucho Marx Woody Allen Brandon Boyd Steven Wright Margaret Atwood

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I’ll steal the letter X, and replace it with treasure. So sex would then be spelled setreasure, but it’d still be just as pleasurable.

All the ideas in the universe can be described by words. Therefore, if you simply take all the words and rearrange them randomly enough times, you’re bound to hit upon at least a few great ideas eventually. Sausage donkey swallows flying guillotine, my love assembly line.

I kissed a mystery, and it tasted like a woman. Lips are always full of delicious secrets.

I don’t like to celebrate my birthday, because I don’t like taking credit for others’ work — in this case, my mom and dad. Or possibly my mom and the… - Jarod Kintz

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