I could scarf down a scarf faster than I could eat any other throat warmer, with the possible exception of your clenched hands around my neck. - Jarod Kintz

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I could scarf down a scarf faster than I could eat any other throat warmer, with the possible exception of your clenched hands around my neck.

English
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About Jarod Kintz

Jarod Kintz is an American author of absurdist humor, known for self-published collections of surreal one-liners and random thoughts. His prolific, often meta-titled works include "This Book is Not for Sale," "99 Cents for Some Nonsense," and "This Book Title is Invisible," published largely through Amazon Kindle. Widely quoted online for his deadpan, nonsensical voice, he describes himself as a writer, absurdist, and duck farmer based in the American South.

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Additional quotes by Jarod Kintz

I'd like to see a flag made not out of stars and stripes, but rather fingers and knuckles, so that it could really wave in the wind. It would be the most welcoming flag in all the world.
The Days of Yay are Here! Wake Me Up When They're Over. Verified in 1 source Sign up to see the complete provenance
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When I found him lying in the ditch holding a shovel, I thought he was sleeping on the job. Turns out he was being even lazier, and he was in fact dead.
At even one penny, this book would be overpriced. In fact, free is too expensive, because you'd still waste time by reading it. · 2012 Verified in 1 source Sign up to see the complete provenance
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