We made love like two coiled up fire hoses. When there’s no fire in the romance, why not act like a couple of sleeping snakes? - Jarod Kintz

The first door in the hall leads to youth, the second door leads to middle age, and the third door leads to the bathroom. But knock first, because I think grandpa’s in there.

Last year, millions of students didn’t graduate from high school. They didn’t drop out, they were simply in elementary and middle schools.

"Too many people talk about the weather, and not enough people talk about agriculture. When somebody says to me, "Beautiful weather we're having,” I always reply, "Irrigation and crop rotation."