Last night I didn’t sleep for a solid eight hours. No, it melted a little. Damn global warming. - Jarod Kintz

My clones better not wear invisible cloaks. How am I supposed to find myself as a person if I can’t even find my clones?

Love isn’t stackable and interlocking, like boxes or Legos. Love is like a one-legged man standing on a three-legged chair that is placed on top of a two-legged piano. I should know, because I’m the guy trying to tune that piano, fix that chair, and affix a prosthetic leg to that guy — who happens to be my piano teacher. Mr. Balloonky, you get down from there now!

Love is as old as time, though it is considerably more difficult to stuff inside a watch.