[when the bank calls:] "Chase Bank, I'm self-employed, how … - Maria Bamford

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[when the bank calls:] "Chase Bank, I'm self-employed, how long do you want to stay on the phone?"

Maria Bamford

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About Maria Bamford

Maria Bamford (born September 3, 1970) is a comedienne from Minnesota. She has appeared on her own Comedy Central special and was a star on the show "Comedians of Comedy".

Also Known As

Alternative Names: Maria Elizabeth Sheldon Bamford

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J. D. Salinger John Lennon Charles M. Schulz Margaret Cho David Sedaris

Additional quotes by Maria Bamford

There's a lot of mental illness in my family. So, if you catch schizophrenia, get four boxes of Mike and Ikes, a Bible, and a cage. Wait it out.

(singing) Old McDonald had a farm, E-I-E-I-O!/

I've never really thought of myself as depressed so much as I am paralyzed by hope.

[when the bank calls:] "Chase Bank, I'm self-employed, how long do you want to stay on the phone?" - Maria Bamford

About Maria Bamford

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Additional quotes by Maria Bamford