I like my relationships like I like my eggs. Over easy. - Jarod Kintz

People tell me I look like my father. I've never seen my dad, so does that mean I look invisible?

Love knows no boundaries. I wish I would have known that before I hired a cartographer to map out my romantic territory.

I don’t think anybody’s ever written a song called, “There’s urine on the couch, and the remote control is in the shower.” I would write it myself, but I’ve never been very good at writing love ballads.