When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go… - Emo Philips

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When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go near the cellar door!" One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I pushed it and walked through and saw strange, wonderful things, things I had never seen before, like... trees. Grass. Flowers. The sun... that was nice... the sun..

Emo Philips

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About Emo Philips

Emo Philips (born Philip Soltanec 7 February 1956) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, voice actor, writer and producer. He is known for his eccentric appearance, surreal humor, and the bizarre cadence of his voice in the delivery of his lines.

Biography information from Wikiquote

Also Known As

Birth Name: Philip Soltanec

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David Sedaris Steven Wright Rodney Dangerfield Jarod Kintz J. D. Salinger

Additional quotes by Emo Philips

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

I got into a fight one time with a really big guy, and he said, "I'm going to mop the floor with your face." I said, "You'll be sorry." He said, "Oh yeah? Why?" I said, "Well, you won't be able to get into the corners very well."

When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go near the cellar door!" One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I p… - Emo Philips

About Emo Philips

Also Known As

Additional quotes by Emo Philips