I worry that there are people who are put in positions of authority because they're good talkers, but they don't have good ideas. It's so easy to con… - Susan Cain

I worry that there are people who are put in positions of authority because they’re good talkers, but they don’t have good ideas,” he said. “It’s so easy to confuse schmoozing ability with talent.

Introverts may have strong social skills and enjoy parties and business meetings, but after a while wish they were home in their pajamas. They prefer to devote their social energies to close friends, colleagues, and family. They listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror of small talk, but enjoy deep discussions.

The “Bus to Abilene” anecdote reveals our tendency to follow those who initiate action — any action. We are similarly inclined to empower dynamic speakers.

Poignancy, she told me, is the richest feeling humans experience, one that gives meaning to life — and it happens when you feel happy and sad at the same time. It’s the state you enter when you cry tears of joy — which tend to come during precious moments suffused with their imminent ending. When we tear up at that beloved child splashing in a rain puddle, she explains, we aren’t simply happy: “We’re also appreciating, even if it’s not explicit, that this time of life will end; that good times pass as well as bad ones; that we’re all going to die in the end. I think that being comfortable with this is adaptive. That’s emotional development.