I skinned a skunk to make a rug. You know, for the bathroom. - Jarod Kintz

I want to create a 3-4 deal — buy three for the price of four. Offer valid for any product but love, which is one for the price of two only.

I’m addicted to warm Thanksgiving bird meat, but I should just quit cold turkey. To me, the beginning of December is like leftover November.

I have a 12:34 representational time dance. I do it at 3:33 every other Tuesday (twice a day). If you’d like to participate in my choreographed dance routine, bring a football helmet and a half empty can of tuna (keeps the stray cats away, because I perform in a gritty, grimy downtown alley).