Sometimes the thing that brings us together also pulls us apart. Sort of like a zipper. - Jarod Kintz

Professional wrestling is a lot like cuddling, I thought as I hugged a tree. As far as lumberjacks go, I’m slow, but when the tree finally falls for me, it falls hard.

If I could bronze my love, it’d be worthy of a silver medal. I would pour you a large glass of Michael Phelps, but I don’t have that much water.

In the throes of passion, I threw out an I love you. Did I mean it? Does a dictionary mean what it says?