Bill Watterson Quotes

From now on, I'm not doing anything I don't want to do! The world owes me happiness, fulfillment and success.... I'm just here to cash in.

I'm not a vegetarian! I'm a dessertarian!

If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life.

I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends.

"[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble.]
Calvin: Ha! I've got a great word and it's on a "Double word score" box!
Hobbes: "ZQFMGB" isn't a word! It doesn't even have a vowel!
Calvin: It is so a word! It's a worm found in New Guinea! Everyone knows that!
Hobbes: I'm looking it up.
Calvin: You do, and I'll look up that 12-letter word you played with all the Xs and Js!
Hobbes: What's your score for ZQFMGB?
Calvin: 957."

Oh look, yet another Christmas TV special! How touching to have the meaning of Christmas brought to us by cola, fast food, and beer.... Who'd have ever guessed that product consumption, popular entertainment, and spirituality would mix so harmoniously?

In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.

Childhood is for spoiling adulthood.

Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.

I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.

Hey Susie Derkins, is that your face, or is a 'possum stuck in your collar?

People pay more attention when they think you’re up to something.

I'M SIGNIFICANT!!!
...
Say's the dust speck.

Calvin: Know what I pray for?
Hobbes: What?
Calvin: The strength to change what I can, the inability to accept what I can't, and the incapacity to tell the difference.

I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.