David Kessler Quotes

Anticipatory grief is something we all go through.

don't think of all the misery, but of all the beauty that remains." — Anne Frank The common belief is that grief is all about pain. Anyone who has been in grief would certainly agree with that. But I believe there is more. There is love. Why do we believe that the pain we feel is about the absence of love? The love didn't die when the person we love died. It didn't disappear. It remains. The question is: How do we learn to remember that person with more love than pain? This is a question, not a mandate. I am the first to say that there is no getting around the pain. We have to go through it because it is an inevitable result of the separation we are experiencing. It's a brutal, forced separation. The word "bereaved" has its origins in the Old English words deprived of, seized, and robbed. That is how it feels when your loved one has been taken from you — as excruciating as if your arm had been ripped from your body. You've been robbed of what is dearest to you. The pain you feel is proportionate to the love you had. The deeper you loved, the deeper the pain. But you will find that love exists on the other side of the pain. It's actually the other face of pain.

Meaning doesn't require understanding. It is not necessary to understand why someone died in order to find meaning.

Imagine the thoughts in your mind as being like a garden. Whatever thoughts you water are the thoughts that will grow. When you have a horrible image in your mind, if you keep looking at it and telling yourself that you can't stop, that image will become stronger and stronger.

Whatever thoughts you water are the thoughts that will grow.

You are the only one who can find the meaning.

Dahulu, saya menggenggam erat kehidupan dalam kepalan tangan, tetapi sekarang saya sadar bahwa saya juga bisa memegangnya dengan tangan terbuka.

But when you're ready to hope again, you will be able to find it. Bad days don't have to be your eternal destiny.

. . . even twins are not here to go on each other's journeys. We have an individualized flight plan.

we have more than opiates for pain, and we have more than anti-anxiety medication to combat fear and distress. We have the “who” and “what” we see before we die, which is perhaps the greatest comfort to the dying.

She realized that for the dying butterflies were a symbol of transformation, not of death, but of life continuing, no matter what.

Heaven and hell offer the same circumstances and conditions. The difference is in the way people treat each other. Choosing to be kind creates one kind of reality. Choosing to be self-centered creates another.

. . . even twins are not here to go on each other's journeys.

It all goes back to letting the person know that while pain from loss is inevitable, suffering is optional.

The families of soldiers who are missing in action are often wrenched by decades of living in limbo. And years later, those left behind still haven't resolved their losses and may not be able to do so until they learn the truth. But that information may never come. Being in limbo of loss, is itself a loss.