Ryan North Quotes

I saw The Mountain Ghost last night and they were really good but also scary! Actually they are called the Mountain GOATS and do not feature scary g-g-g-ghosts. Luckily.

I collect power supplies like other men collect meaningful relationships! THAT IS TO SAY, AT THE RATE OF ABOUT ONE A YEAR

I'm totally applying assumed Creative Commons rights.

I speculate that the genesis of the chicken-joke lies in some situation such as the one illustrated above, but over time the original context of the joke was lost, which left the chicken sadly decontextualized.

Man, staying at home is for chumps! You could shake the man's hand! YOU COULD TOTALLY SMOOCH HIM MAYBE.
maybe not but still!

We're all already aware of boobies; it is the general state of most people in North America! THANKS, MEDIA AND THE MALE GAZE

You're supposed to whore yourself out! Nobody will judge you! ACTUALLY EVERYONE WILL JUDGE YOU THAT'S HOW THE SYSTEM WORKS

Of course it's easy to get on public transit! It's public transit.

Don't worry, it's very clear that the painting was done by a human, most likely a human with one eye removed and a feverent if incorrect understanding of design and anatomy.

Failure is just success rounded down.

Strange things in the neighbourhood (partial list):

They are "sexcellent". That is a pun for you, you will find lots of puns on the internet! Also: blonde jokes.

I'm suddenly worried people will think that I believe their religion can be summed up on four sex-obsessed sentences.

Good luck distinguishing which sign is the REAL sign when my entire front lawn is covered with thousands of little green signs - each with a different number! Ahahahah! I'll be EVERY address in the whole freakin' township! And what are you gonna do about it? Hopefully, NOTHING!

If you find you are not understanding my explanation for a joke, hit "F5" on your browser and the page will refresh and I will explain it again.